Lecture Review: Can a Muslim have Islam without the prayers?

Praying Salah can be hard for Muslims, for years, that described me. Prayer was intimidating for me. I felt insecure praying. I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t think my recitation was eloquent enough or my connection with Allah was powerful enough. 

MashaAllah tabarakAllah My mother loves to pray… and pray...and pray. For her, the longer her prayers, the better. MashaAllah TabarakAllah she has infamously long prayer marathons every Salah. While I was unsure of the entire ritual – like what am I saying at each step? Am I even saying it correctly? What does it all mean anyway? I knew prayer was something great. I had seen my mother sometimes so absorbed in Salah like she was embracing Divinity through the Power of Prayer. She was able to immerse herself in prayer like Heaven had come down to Earth and she was holding an audience with God. 

In my consciousness I revere and accept the idea of God but did not know how to reach him. I wanted, so badly, to experience prayer but I lacked the tools to develop the passion and concentration for a good prayer.  When I couldn't get to 100% in my Salah, I stopped trying completely. 

 I am not alone. Many Muslims create a long list of reasons not to pray, from feeling not good at it, to being bored and feeling empty when they do pray; from not wanting to bother God, to thinking God cannot be bothered if we pray or not. Or someone seemingly religious, turned us away from prayer.

 While these may seem like giant hurdles we can’t get over, we can. Shaykh Nasir Jangda advises that you stare at each of these prayer obstacles in the face and ask Allah to change your heart.  Rather than viewing Salah as a mostly boring, often ineffective ritual, make it the heartbeat of all you  do. 

I am not good enough to pray?

Shaykh Nasir Jangda explains that many of us fear that we aren’t passionate, faithful or pure enough to offer Salah. Instead of trying and failing in our prayers, we don’t try at all. We forget that Allah loves the Salah of imperfect people, people who know they’ve done wrong, who know they are helpless on their own, who reach out to Him, who know they need him.

Salah is boring? 

Or sometimes Salah simply bores us. Our minds wander. In the middle of a conversation with the Creator of the universe, I sometimes remember that I haven’t vacuumed the carpet in two days or that we’re running low on toilet paper. Once I’m bored and distracted, I feel so guilty I don’t want to keep praying.

وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلَاةِ وَإِنَّهَا لَكَبِيرَةٌ إِلَّا عَلَى الْخَاشِعِينَ

And seek help through patience and the prayer (Salah); and indeed, it is (Salah) surely difficult except on al Khasheen (Quran, 2:45)

Khasheen are believers who have such deep knowledge of the Book of Allah that inspires their hearts to break with respect and awe of Him. Their extensive comprehension of Allah's Words causes their hearts to tremble with  reverence and astonishment of Him. 

It is absolutely crucial to understand the linguistic beauty of Salah. When you understand Who you’re talking to and what you are saying to Him— when you acknowledge that the God of the universe is honestly, truly excited to hear from you — that truth alone will change your attitude toward prayer. Move the focus from yourself onto Allah. That’s the beginning of making prayer fresh and exciting. Even fun. Then prayer is like talking to a close friend with whom you can share your heart, your fears, and your dreams. Then, suddenly, instead of a lifeless one-way conversation, prayer with the Allah -  the Owner of Peace, the Source of Rizq, the Founder of Love, becomes exhilarating.

I prayed and prayed but didn’t get anything? 

One more excuse for avoiding prayer — and this is the deal-breaker for most of us— is that we just aren’t sure our prayers will make a difference. We’ve tried praying before and nothing seemed to happen. 

But Allah is All Hearing and Aware of your prayers. When you pray and Allah specifically answers your prayers or grants you something better than what you asked for, you will never be the same again. I know my daughter has become such a firm believer in prayer Alhamdulillah. For months, she had been begging me to get a cat. After her cute face and adorable voice finally wore me down, I agreed that if Allah wanted she could have a cat. That night she prayed for tens of cats whom she could carry, feed and cuddle. The next day when we landed in Madina, it was cat season. Cats everywhere, all over the city. My daughter was elated. Allah heard her prayers even though she is just a toddler. She spent a week cashing, playing and feeding cats. 

But even when you don’t see the results of your prayers around you, you may still sense Allah’s loving presence
 and you grow to know and appreciate His numerous other blessings in your life. I’ve learned that any genuine communication with Allah may or may not change what Allah does, but your prayer will often change your heart or perspective.

‎💖 لِوَجْہ الله💖 Face of Allah

Alhamdulillah I don’t think the Kabaah leaves anyone the same after the first encounter.
My immediate feelings after seeing the Kabaah were an infusion of love, faith and reverence for Allah. Then I thought, how wonderful it would feel to actually see Allah AlMighty, the Supremely Magnificent, the Lord of Kaabah Himself.

The House of Allah, the Kaabah, from which shone the light of Islam became the best place of worship.

Alhamdulillah this year when I came to Makkah, it felt like a long awaited and well deserved home-coming to my Creator.
(a) Praying Salah here, at the very spot where Jibreel (as) first taught the Prophet Muhammed saws how to pray
(b) Reading the Quran, at the very spot where the Quran was first revealed,
(c) retracing the footsteps of thousands of Prophets during Tawwaf and Saii was Alhamdulillah an enriching and uplifting experience.

It felt so fortunate, to be part of a holy legacy, much bigger than myself.

Alhamdulillah I was  surreal saying each Beautiful Name of Allah in Duaa while gazing at the Kabaah.
In the chaos of our lives, faith becomes a distant and abstract concept but here at the House of Allah, when all responsibilities and distractions were set aside, and I tapped into the spiritual epicentre of my soul, Allah felt so close. His all-transcending, omnipotently sovereignity, His compassionate presence, His peaceful goodness and blessings felt so manifest.

I couldn't help but think, how wonderful it would feel to see the Ultimate Glory of Allah's Face, meet Him with all His Noor and Jaamal, without any hijab. Today, I just needed an Umrah visa to see the Kaabah, what can I do I can see the Face of the Lord of Kaabah,  on the Last Day.

‎💖 لِوَجْہ الله💖

‎💖💖The ultimate success that will never fade or be in vain is when a person is able to achieve Allah’s Approval and gaze upon His Countenance on the Last Day.

‎💖💖Allah will give the privilege and honour of meeting His acquaintance and bestowing the pleasure and delight of seeing His countenance to only those with whom He is well Pleased.

‎💖💖To see Allah’s Face, we need to complete all our responsibilities with utmost sincerity for Him.

‎
💖💖Try to imagine that we can see Him just as He Sees us every moment of every day. anyone who lives with this condition of ehsaan will be rewarded with Seeing Allah’s countenance on the Last Day

‎💖💖Salah, fasting, sacrifice, any form of remembrance and duaa, learning knowledge, meeting with family... any good deed imaginable, just for the sake of seeing Allah’s Face.

‎💖💖 Focus our thought process entirely onto Allah. Start this as an exercise first in Salah then transfer this habit to every activity.

‎💖💖Any Salah that is offered with total focus and humility and love and respect towards Allah, will be rewarded with total forgiveness of sins.

‎💖💖Any fast kept for the sake of Allah’s Face is rewarded with Jannah.

‎💖💖Any group of people who gather together to remember Allah for the sake of seeing His Face, Allah not only forgives their sins but also converts their sins into good deeds.

‎💖💖Learning knowledge for the sake of seeing Allah’s Face (allowing the knowledge to inspire
oneself to come closer to Allah in consciousness and in actions) should be our highest intention. Learning knowledge for the sake of this world alone will deprive one from even the scent of Jannah.

‎💖💖O Allah give us the grace and strength to seek Your Face behind everything we do aameen

Lecture Review: How to live a life of devotion to Allah

Every devoted Muslim desires to be more devoted to Allah. It is pleasant to feel in one’s heart an ardent desire to love Allah and the Prophet (s.a.w) more. When I visited Makkah and Madina this year, alhamduillah, I was filled with fondness for Allah and His Messenger (s.a.w) and my heart felt happy in loving my Rabb and His Habeeb. I felt I could not love them enough. I wanted to love them more. My heart burned to love them further though my heart was already full to the brim and my tears were endlessly flooding out onto my face, out of love for them. I wish there was some way I could increase my capacity to love them. To expand the vessels of my soul and pour out more love for them. 

My heart had never been so complete with love and the happiest; and although it was happy and satisfied, yet it craved to love more. To live here forever until I die and meet them. 

Dawud al-Tai used to say during the night in prayer to Allah, ‘My desire for You has negated all other desires, and it has come between me and the desire for sleep. My longing for looking on at Your Countenance has lessened all worldly delights and has come between me and my lusts. I stand in Your devotion with all of my heart, body and Soul, O Kind One (al-Karim)! What business have I with anyone other than You? What business have I, With a partner who would turn my heart from returning to You? What would I do if he run away from me and all hopes are frustrated? He can replace me but I have none to replace You!

To the soul in the ecstasy of its heavenly love, the world with its pleasures has vanished away like a morning vapor.

The desire to love and be in devotion is a restless pining, an aching void of a grateful heart in spiritual re-awakening; it is a delightful struggling of a soul bearing closeness to Allah, to dissolve oneself entirely to be near Him.

This lecture on devotion is an attempt to love Allah and the Prophet (s.a.w) more and to keep this love alive every day in the little things that we do. The more we love an object, the more devoted to it we are. Devotion is therefore love manifested.

Devotion to Allah implies ardent affection for Him -- a yielding of the heart to Him with reverence, faith, and piety in the way we think, we speak, we dress, we act with people both family and strangers and particularly in the manner we perform our prayers (Salah). 

 To a devoted heart, prayer is a delightful conversation that grows one’s relationship with Allah. To a devoted mind, the Quran is sweeter than all sounds that engages and beholds all beauty and wisdom. A devoted personality, rooted in Allah, is one that is merciful in all her relationships with people because she is seeking the merciful embrace of Allah. 

O Allah! take our hearts and compress within them that pure love from You that will cause us to love You, and devote ourselves to You. Enlarge our hearts with Your Mercy so all the pain from our relationships is replaced with love for You and the desire to be merciful to others out of service for You - aameen. 

PoemReview: "If" by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep you head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two imposters the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:
...
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And-which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

This poem is loaded with a historical significance and innuendo which I am going to bypass to focus on why I find this poem so inspiring. The poem contains a multitude of characteristics deemed essential to any person who seeks to persevere during hard times. In particular, a person must be humble, patient, rational, truthful, dependable, and forbearing  Her behaviour in response to deleterious events and cruel people is important; she must continue to have faith in herself when others doubt her, she must understand that her words might be twisted and used for evil, she must be able to deal with the highest and lowest echelons of society, and she must be able to withstand the lies and hatred emanating from others. 

She must possess self-trust and ability to understand the thoughts and feelings of others, even if that means understanding that people will not always like her or agree with her. If she is lied to or lied about, she must not stoop to the level of the liars. If she is hated she must not become hateful. Treat people in a manner that is reflective of her personal moral and spiritual high-ground rather the station where they are in their lives. 
Dreams and ambitions should not loosen her grip on reality. Success and failure are fleeting; the disruption or change that accompanies both disappears quickly. Do not dwell on enemies or disappointments.  All in all, she must be willing to pick herself up and start anew.

The virtues expressed in the poem are devoid of showiness or glamour; it is notable that the poem says nothing of heroic deeds of war, political engagements or great wealth or fame. True measure of a person is her humility, her resilience  and her stoicism. The virtues of fortitude, responsibility and resolution articulated  in the poem are especially valuable even in the complicated, straitened postmodern world. 

Fiqh al Quloob Reflection: Fish out of Water

Today’s, Fiqh al Qulub فقه الإيمان باالله pages 737, class started with a reminder to be actively learning the Deen. 

I remember when I was in elementary school, everyday started with the national anthem. Rain or shine, snow or storm, we stand “O Canada!” each and everyday in English and in French. I didn’t question this regime then but it makes sense to me now. With the singing of the anthem, teachers, the school board, and the government at large, wants students to realize their identity and and role as good Canadian citizens, well-equipped to contribute positively to our community. Each day, the anthem reminded us of our values and the fundamental actions which were expected from us. 

Now that I am all grown up, I understand and appreciate the value of this repetition. As human beings, we need to be in a constant journey to learning. Without a daily reminder of our beliefs and values, we loose direction and sincerity in our tasks. 

Islam is not something we declare on our passport as our choice of religion, or order on a menu when we go out to eat. It is our way of life and our worldview. We carry our faith with us everywhere, even when we are going to bed. To properly engage with our faith, I feel that we need to be inspired everyday. The truth is, our religious integrity and our commitment to our principles wear off. It is one thing to know the dogma, academically and another thing to actively engage with it, with all our senses, thoughts, feelings and imagination, everyday. We want to be in a stat where we are cognizant of what our faith is and how we are going to to apply it. 

Consciously being part of a learning group like Fiqh al Quloob class makes us mindful of our faith. It also helps us develop a moment-by-moment awareness of our emaan and apply it to all our life’s endeavours and relationships. I feel like a fish out of water when I am not listening to some faith based lecture. It is not only therapeutic but also invigorating. It renews my purpose for the whole day and how I look at my day. 

• Who am I? Why am I doing this? 

• What does Allah want to teach me in this moment?

• How can I appreciate Allah in this situation and show Him importance? 

• How might I serve Allah today today? 

This is especially important when we are surrounded by a godless society which is assaulting our religious values. It is important that we are connected with a faith-based learning community to maintain our Islam with grave, wisdom and good cheer. 

Gratitude Journal - Baby Girl

Alhamdulillahi ala kuli haal these past nine months were so hectic and depressing, I had to make a conscious decision to write down at least one thing that I am grateful for every single night. Gratitude helped me cope with the pain. Gratitude shifted my outlook on life, it made me more appreciative of little things, more compassionate towards everyone and patient in all circumstances. 

 Alhamdulilah, I am concluding the gratitude journal today by giving thanks for, perhaps the greatest blessing of Allah in my life.  I am super thankful to Allah for the cute little addition to my family.
Alhamdulillah, Allah blessed me with a beautiful baby doll. I am grateful to Allah for her health. I am grateful for the happiness galore I felt. She is the light of my eyes, and the warmth of my heart.
I ask Allah to help me prize the great treasure of parenting and sustain us with the skills and discipline necessary to raise her as مُسۡلِمَـٰتٍ۬ مُّؤۡمِنَـٰتٍ۬ قَـٰنِتَـٰتٍ۬ تَـٰٓٮِٕبَـٰتٍ عَـٰبِدَٲتٍ۬ سَـٰٓٮِٕحَـٰتٍ۬ - Muslim woman, sincere believing woman who is obedient and devoted to Allâh, turning to Allâh in repentance, worshipping Allah with genuine humility, love and respect, committed to fasting and traveling in search of knowledge - aamen. 

Surah At-Tahrim:5

Gratitude Journal - Khatam Qur'an

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 I cannot thank Allah enough, I just finished studying the Tafseer of the entire Qur'an for the third time. To be honest, Qur'an isn't something that I can ever "finish" reading. Even if it consumed my entire lifetime, I will still not be 'done' studying the Qur'an. 

'Finishing' the Qur'an was a pregnancy resolution. I wanted to read the entire Qur'an as some one-time task to check off on my to-do list before the baby was born. Now I am convinced that reading the Qur'an inshaAllah needs to become a daily spiritual discipline in my baby's and my life. 

Without studying the meaning, our understanding of Quran is like a collage of little pictures glued together on a poster board. We know bits and pieces of the Quran and a lot of Quran stories, but we don't know how everything fits together. We don't know a lot of the context behind the content of the Qur'an. 

Alhamdulillah Allah guided me to undertake a six month journey through the Qur'an. I opened the Qur'an to Surah Baqarah in Ramadan, under the tutelage of Ustadh Nouman and began to listen to his tafseer reflections everyday. Averaging a few verses a day, I walked with Ibrahim in the deserts of ancient Mesopotamia and sailed along with Nuh (a.s) as he waited for the promised land. I observed the brutality of Pharaoah and climbed the mount Tur with Musa (a.s). I witnessed Allah's displeasure and disapproval of oppression and injustice and rape and infanticide and the idolatry which led to it all. Verse after verse, I saw the suffering, sin always brings and Allah’s continual, tender call to His people: “Come to Me. Make Me your refuge. Give your hearts to Me and no other. Turn from your sin and suffering and come to Me.” I concluded that the Qur'an isn't a rule book; it was a love story between me and my Rabb (Master).

Even now, Allah who called Adam (a.s) and the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w), is calling me to Himself through His Surahs. His love for me pulses through every point of time and pursues me right now—even through the modern day technology of this blog! Every time I open the Quran and read Allah's Words, I realize that:

1.  Allah's is closer to me than my heartbeat. 

2. Allah is in control and no one in all of history has ever thwarted His Plan. Allah's plan for His believing servants is always good and I can trust that Allah will bless me with goodness during and after every difficulty. Nothing can derail His blessings from me. Also that Allah keeps His promises, always. 

3. Allah's concern for me is steadfast and it presents itself as a constant theme in theme Qur'an. Allah is absolutely undeterred in His mission to save me from suffering caused by sins. His punishment comes from a place of deep grief and with the intent of rehabilitation, not revenge.  

4. The Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w), along with all the other prophets and messengers, are the real heroes of this world's history. From the beginning of time Allah has sent us heroes who will guide us to our highest potential as human beings and back to Himself. 

I am so grateful to Allah alhamdulilah for giving me the opportunity to study the Tafseer again. Quran is the foundation of all learning, a human right, a tool of personal empowerment and a means for social and human development, 

Gratitude Journal - Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan

T - 2 Alhamdulillah I am really grateful to Allah for Ustadh Nouman Ali Khan. 
 Without question, Ustadh Nouman is by far the greatest English speaking commentator on Tafseer of our time; his examples are universal and timeless in application; he speaks with inexhaustible wisdom.  More than that, through him, I have come to appreciate the Arabic language so much more. 
His literary explanation of the Qur'an has alhamdulillah helped me think deeply about Allah and understand His plan for my life. No other speaker, besides Ustazah Dr. Farhat, has never had such a wide ranging, positive and constructive impact on my life. His explanation beautifully invigorated the way I think of Allah, my prayers and my ambitions in life. Because of Ustadh Nouman, alhamdulillah I made a regular habit to not only study the Qur'an, but make it the centre of my life again. Alhamdulillah every day, for the past six months, Ustadh Nouman helped me improve my faith, my morals, my religious practices and my relationships. 

In these past six months, I have experienced a wide range of reactions, emotions, and feelings from listening to Ustadh Nouman's tafseer, depending on the Surah. Alhamdulillah through the verses, I found comfort in his explanation during times of anxiety and stress, answers to lingering questions about theology and morality,  purpose and direction in my career and marriage, deeper insight of what it means to adopt Islam as mission nd not just a religion, and practical advise for coping with life's challenges. Alhamdulillah his tafseer closed the gulf between my beliefs and practical life. 

Gratitude Journal - thumma alhamdulillah

T - 13 Alhamdulillah for the ability to give thanks to Allah, to see good in all of Allah's decisions.

T - 12 Alhamdulillah for bigger room

T - 11 Alhamdulillah for people who make dua  for me

T - 10 Alhamdulillah for unlimited wifi

T - 9 Alhamdulillah for brothers

T - 8 Alhamdulillah for my personal library of 300 books

T - 7 Alhamdulillah for warm water

T - 6 Alhamdulillah for warm soup

T - 5 Alhamdulillah for Salah al Bukhatir Surah al Baqarah recitation

T - 4 Alhamdulillah for epidural

T - 3 Alhamdulillah for feminine hygiene products 

Gratitude Journal - Istikhara

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Alhamdulillah for Istikhara dua. Every time I have asked Allah for goodness in my Deen, dunya and akhirah through Istikhara dua, Allah has put my mind to peace and given me relief from anxiety and stress. Alhamdulilalh for every time Allah has blessed me with clarity of mind and ease in my life through istikhara. 

Gratitude Journal - Conference

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Normal kids transition from high school to the adult world by getting a part-time job at Walmart or by playing in the arcade all summer. I did it by volunteering for a conference. My whole life was preparing me for this mission. Alhamdulillah in the summer of 2011, I was part of something international. 
I had recently quit my four years of voluntary service at another institute and I was internally compelled to serve the Deen in some capacity elsewhere. I knew the desire was planted inside me by Allah and I was prayerfully begging Him for some religious work. The opportunity came when I got picked up by the conference's Operations' Team as Content Coordinator. They let me fill their website and program book with biographies and articles, slogans and poems. Alhamdulillah they published me. They harnessed my gift of writing. Sure I didn't get remunerated but the experience was incredibly empowering. Thousands of people read my writing and took it home.  Church leaders and Synagogue heads across Toronto received dawah letters written by me. I corresponded with international speakers to help organize their talks on stage. I wrote lines for the MC-s. I pray that during this process, somehow, someone's life was impacted positively because of my words.  I thank Allah for allowing me to use my words for the public good. I ask Allah to continue to use me and my words for the work of His Deen amen. 

Gratitude Journal - Winter

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I am grateful to Allah for winter - I find cool weather relaxing; I love being stretched out on the overstuffed couch with my favourite fluffy blanket, a good book and a steamy cup of sweetness. I love the ethereal beauty of frozen trees, that stand like giant crystals decorating the sidewalk. I am thankful to Allah for the cold winter air which is brisk and invigorating. It makes me feel alive, it tickles my cheeks and chill my nose. I love stamping my feet on freshly fallen quilt of snow. It feels like I am walking on volume and bulk but its actually powder, light at feather. I love how sound is dampened when snow falls, every thing becomes timeless, peaceful and tranquil. As I walk outside, the cold air and the snow pleads my mind to be still, to purify itself, to be prayerful and appreciate the profound stunning beauty of Allah's creation.

Gratitude Journal - Too many blessings to count

T - 26 Alhamdulillah for Baby'sRus

T - 25 Alhamdulillah for a day off

T - 24 Alhamdulillah for the alone, long, warm, relaxing showers

T - 23 Alhamdulillah for Shaami Kabab

T - 22 Alhamdulillah for the problems that brings family together

T - 21 Alhamdulillah for all the lovely people who made me breakfast/lunch this past month when I couldn't make it to the kitchen on my own two feet.

T - 20 Alhamdulillah for hand-me downs.

T - 19 Alhamdulillah for nieces and nephews who say the wittiest things. I love their honest and unexpected pint-sized perspective. Never a dull moment around them.

T- 18 Alhamdulillah for creative art projects that allow me to express myself and relieve my stress without hurting anyone in the process - jk.

T - 17 Alhamdulillah for raspberry mojito and Philly cheese steak sandwich at BlackOx Bistro. Alhamdulillah for my MIL's shrimp recipe. 

Balancing Home and Work

Having a good career is important for many married women - the obvious reason: money. It is hard to live a comfortable without having a steady income of your own. Second reason is passion. Many married women are seeking fulfillment outside the home. However, having a thriving career with a failing marriage is no great achievement. We as wives and mothers must realize that the report card of respect comes not from the size of our pay checks, but the level of radiance from our husbands and children, whom we claim to be priority in our lives. Raising children with faith that lasts is our symbol of success. Our husbands' love is our greatest achievement.

Marriage and parenting are a challenging commitment. There is a cost involved. Maybe a dream that cannot be chased, a career advancement that cannot be taken, or a schedule that can't be followed. The bottom line is that our work should never compromise our marriage and our parenting. So before we sign ourselves up for more pay for more hours, we should ask ourselves, do my children feel cherished? Does my husband feel I am taking responsibility of the house in areas where he needs me? Am I fulfilling the role Allah called me to play in my ibaadah?

It is the same for husbands - before they enrol for another course or schedule another meeting, they should check if their wives are more starved for their time. There is nothing wrong in having a thriving career. Just never at the cost of our spouse and children, about whom we made a covenant with Allah.  

SuperMom

Conceiving a human being and parenting it - from delivering to nursing and potty training, transitioning it to sleep alone at night to teaching it how to read and write; coping with its teenage tantrums and spending on its interest expansion -  is perhaps the most difficult job on earth. This is why motherhood incorporates forbearance, long-suffering, perseverance, patience and composure.
A mother is Allah's vessel for the procreation of future generations. Her hand which rocks the cradle, rules the world for many centuries to come. Therefore, relationship between the mother and her kids should be one that will bring peace in the hearts and in the homes. No matter what occurs inside the family and outside, a mother needs to raise her kids with utmost prudence, guidance and love.

The following is a to-do list for mom, recommended by Dr. Farhat Hashmi in her lecture, "Achhi Maain Achhi Naslain": 

1. A mother embodies all the good qualities she wishes to transfer to her children. Especially when it comes to Islamic education, it is basically imitation; children tend to imitate the attitudes of their parents. They never lose sight of their parents praying, reciting the Qur'an and following the sunnah in little matters. They have some kind of radar, which detects everything their parents are saying and doing. They absorb the values and repetition of the behaviours which they see in their parents. 

Therefore, parents educate or un-educate, first, through their example, and particularly, through the orientation they give to their whole existence; in the end,
a) either to love of self, the TV, the dunya
b) or to love of Allah and, in akhirah and for the Deen.

2. A mother prays for what she desires her children to become. Imaam Bukhari's mom used to pray tahajjudd and cry endlessly in supplication for her son which led him to become the most legendary scholar of all times. Hannah (a.s) was also devoted to prayer for her kid and focused on protecting her child from the influences of shaytan. The Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) made dua for his baby cousin to be educated in the Qur'an. 

3. A mother speaks to people (especially her husband, her parents and in-laws) as if they are wise, kind, beautiful human beings, for her children will treat people the way they see their mother.

4. A vast majority of mothers work and earn their own money. More often than not, moms expect dads to pay for all of their children's expense. This frequently leads to marital conflict. When a mother spends on her kids from her own money, she gets the reward of giving double sadaqah (charity).  Abdullah bin Masoud's wife (r.a) was a working woman and she would spend a portion of her salary on taking care of their kids. 

5. The whole process of meals  and snacks - packing lunches, coming up with a versatile menu, preparing the food and cleaning up is like getting a root canal and a kidney stone removed at the same time.  No matter how gruelling, feeding children in a mother's primary responsibility. A mother who takes the time to feed her kids will be protected from Hellfire. A woman came to Aisha (r.a)'s house and requested something to eat. She gave the woman three dates. The woman fed the dates to her starving baby girls and went hungry herself. The Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) said, Allah is so pleased with her sacrifice that He has rescued her from Hellfire. 

6. A mother seeks medical treatment for her kids and does ruqiyah on them. A sahabiyah noticed that her kids get affected with evil eye and fall sick often. The Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) gave her permission to do ruqiyah on them. 

7. A mother prepares her kids to pray Salah by the age of 7, she makes her kids fast with her and go for Hajj and Eid salah with her. 

8. A mother teaches children to respect other people's privacy.

9. A mother introduce kids to good environments - friends and relatives, teachers and role models, print and online media that will be a positive influence on them.

Gratitude Journal - Shopping

T - 29 - This goes against everything I believe in, but yesterday I was actually grateful for going shopping. Spending money on “self-treats” (without busting your budget) can alhamdulillah improve lingering sadness and stress. I don't mean that shopping is the best coping mechanism (there is not enough money in the world to deal with the endless supply of problems). However, small indulgences every now and then, like Vanilla Bean Crème Mocha, a pair of small square faux zircon earrings or Robert Ludlum's new novel, alhamdulillah can be an instant mood booster.

Gratitude Journal - Doctors & Nurses

T – 30 Medicines can cure, but a good doctor’s inspirational words can give the strength to fight from within.

I am also thankful to Allah for doctors who understand responsibility better than privilege; practice accountability more than business. Going to a hospital can be scary and traumatizing for many, I am grateful for all the doctors and nurses who diagnose beyond the medical reports and heal the emotional suffering and pain of their patients. Alhamdulillah for every member of the medical apparatus who prescribes encouragement and positive attitude.